Thursday, October 02, 2003

At the risk of sounding like Andy Rooney, there are two observations on the minor nuisances of everyday life I would like to present to you.

Point One: I was at the post office the other day, and passing by the pawn shop next door, and there was a sign in the pawn shop firmly requesting that you turn off your cell phone. Cell phones, I grant, are highly annoying; one should definately turn them off in a movie theater or during any presentation, and when dining in a fine restaurant, or in a library, or anytime common sence dictates. But whenever I find myself complaining about cell phones, I do not find myself lamenting how the rise of cell phone has stripped pawn shops of their charm. Are we to whistfully reminisce about a time, long ago, when one could step into their friendly neighborhood pawn shop with a VCR and get $20 to buy smack, and not have this very special moment, one of life's few remaining simple pleasures, spoiled by the piercing ring of a cell phone? I am considerate in my use of my cell phone, but come on, people, do we really need all these rules? Half the people at the pawn shop are probably raising money to pay their cell phone bill, be grateful they exist, pawn shop owner.

Point two: Why are the slowest drivers also the most unsafe? I find myself, more and more, stuck behind people driving less than twenty MPH on city streets, and sometimes I feel guilty getting impatient, since I was speeding before they came along, and so aren't I the menace on the road? Yet I've noticed that it is these slow, apparently concientious drivers who do the truly stupid things. They may be driving slow on the open stretches, but they also go through the intersections at the same speed, stop signs be damned. Today some asshole going about fifteen MPH right in front of me, missed a red light (meaning, of course, that I did too), and preceded to run it, cutting off the person who had the green. I think more people need to get tickets for going too slowly, maybe then a paper trail will emerge to strip a few of the elderly of their licences. I should be fair, it's not just the elderly; the guy who ran the light looked to be about thirty. I used to enjoy driving, but good God it's gotten stressful lately.

I'm watching CMT (which is no longer carrying the Grand Ole Opry--what the fuck?!), and just saw the new June Carter Cash video. Am I a horrible person if I observe she should have stuck to singing backups?

No comments: